::: best date essay contest :::

Essay Contest

"WHY I WOULD BE YOUR BEST DATE FOR THE 2010 NICHOLL FELLOWSHIPS IN SCREENWRITING AWARDS AND BANQUET."

The Winners Yay!

first place
david kurtz

Why I Would Be A Good Escort For Max
by David Kurtz

I grew up in the heart of tobacco, was educated in the land of peaches, refined myself into a young thinking man on the southernmost shores of the union. I've been inculcated in the virtues of pulling out a lady's chair and assuring her fingertips never dirty on a doorknob. These things are my blood and marrow.

I've cut my teeth on enough sets to never be startled or awed...to be equally calm and affable with beggars and kings...to enjoy myself and share that joy.

I have a fine black suit.
I dance.
I am a Southern Gentleman.

~~DK

first runner up
sean gannon

Being a Mild-Mannered PowerPoint Guy
by Sean Gannon

Being a mild-mannered PowerPoint guy facing a tight word count, I was predisposed to do more of a bullet-point list than an essay. And it's divided into three sections. [Insert 'closet nerd' joke here.]

QUALIFICATIONS:

* I'm not married, gay, nor gay-married.
* I'm 6'4" (see also: Chick, too tall to be a)
* I'm not a Republican (tho some of my best friends... nah, that's bullshit)
* Silverware skills?! Why, yes, I can juggle all KINDS of silverware!
* Have: cat
* Don't have: naked pictures
* But do have: naked pictures of cat
* BONUS: Your smoking is cool with me — I'll even join you!

PITCH:

I've enjoyed your company previously, and I can ably perform such soirée functions as sweatless handshakes, laughing politely and not vomiting on the topiaries.

CONCLUSION:

Ooo! Pick me! Pick me!

second runner up
matt bomer

Why I Want Max
by Matt Bomer

Kidding! Matt Bomer did not enter.

•In the event the first place winner cannot perform his duties first place duties will fall to the first runner up.
•"Duties" do not involve boots knocking. Pervos!
•Thank you to everyone who entered, as much fun as I have had at times at entrants' expense [and I have, oops, bad me], I am honored and gratified there were so many entrants. You are all wonderful men thank you for entering and making me feel not like a wallflower.

:::back to competition page:::